I Shouldn't Be Allowed in Public!

Last weekend I was with M at a Starbucks. We were patiently waiting for our drinks along with a small ground of other caffeine hounds. While twiddling our thumbs we noticed a bucket filled with bags of used coffee grounds. Starbucks gives grounds away for free so people can use them as garden fertilizer. M jokingly suggested that we could also save money by using the grounds to make our own fire logs (one of my favorite brands of fire log is made from grounds). I replied "yes, but we'd have to find a way to impregnate them with paraffin first." This was a "throw away" conversation only meant to amuse us while we waited. However, the woman standing in front of us with child took it very seriously. The moment I said "impregnated" her head snapped around as if it were a weathervane. She spent the next couple of minutes staring daggers at me until her coffee finally arrived and she was able to flee from the social misfit. I love being shocking without even trying.