Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Baby Class #2: In Which We Hear Angels Sing

We knew this class would go better when we saw that there was actually a teacher in the room. She gave a brief apology for the confusion, and then got down to business. Once again I was struck by how odd it was to be in a room with so many other women in their third trimester. It's not that common to see another pregnant woman outside of the doctor's office, but here we all have bellies of remarkably similar size. We took turns introducing ourselves, and then it was time to look at diagrams.

Our teacher is someone desperately in need of a laptop. She used several poster-sized anatomy pictures in spite of the fact that a projector and screen were all set up. We learned that our babies are already quite large, but that most will still double in size before they are born. We also learned that life is about to get much more uncomfortable due to that extra weight. Then we learned the best, most wonderful thing that she told us all evening.

She had each woman take the chair in which she was sitting and turn it around. Then, she had a straddle the chair with our bellies resting again the chair back. Then, we placed a pillow again the chair back to cushion our bellies. This way we could lean into the chair, rest some of our baby weight again the pillow, and still not squish anything vital. Did that make any sense? Anyway, it felt incredible. The moment we each accomplished this technique, you could hear sighs of relief from all around the room. This pose is SO much better than sitting, hunched up, at computer or desk.

We did several other stretches and poses, but none were as wonderful as the first. When it came time to watch stupid videos, I was still feeling very generous due to the sense relief in my back and hips. However, this video was hard going. Made in the early '90's, it depicted a woman with shockingly bad hair who had decided to have a natural childbirth. She grunted and sweated her way through the various stages as a voice off stage reminded us that we have an innate knowledge of how to deliver our babies. I could see that M's shoulders were already shaking by this point, but then it got far worse. Just as the baby began to crown, a choir of angelic voices burst forth. Personally, I am hoping that no music will issue from any part of my baby during the birth of our child.

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